Finally I’m getting angry

Yes.  At last.

But no not with Alex but with the Other Woman.  I can’t believe I have lasted this long.  But it came to me this morning on my early morning ‘lake walk’.

Alex met OW in 2008 when he was away on a course.    I have recently discovered that he then exchanged emails with her and also met her on one occasion over the next 4 months.  He left downloads of these emails on the PC he has left behind so I have been able to find  out about the initial stages of this friendship.

And I do believe –  I still believe that at this stage it was just a strong friendship.

Then he invited her to stay with us over New Year.  Yes I know all of you ‘out there’ will be saying “Come on Caroline – it’s him you should be angry with.  His deceit – rubbing your nose in his new found love”  But I believe him when he says it wasn’t like that.

She accepted.  And within 5 minutes of her entering our house I knew I had a problem.  Clear as the day that dawns it was obvious she had turned up to “Suss out the opposition”.  She made it clear to me that she was out to get him and that she didn’t see me as a problem.  She even announced during our party that at the age of 42 she was now seeking a husband as she wanted to find a man so she could have some children before it was too late!

The audacity of the woman is horrifying.  The cold blooded intention to get her own way and to accept my hospitality whilst doing it is breath taking.  This is one truly nasty person.

She stayed for 2 days – 2 ghastly days.  At first I thought I was imagining it but I knew by the time she left.  I even said to Alex “Don’t go having an affair with her because she is after you”.  And of course at that stage I was unaware that she had been emailing him and contacting him.

My darling husband was bedazzled by the attention and I still think just overawed and infatuated.

Four weeks later he left me.

I have tried so hard to be understanding – to see that she might be a kind woman.  To be the person he professes her to be.  He tells me “She only wants me to be happy”!!   Dream on sunshine!  That statement SO DOESN’T WORK on any level.

Finally my anger – which has been bubbling beneath the surface – needs to explode into the world.  And it has.

Wow AM I ANGRY.

3 thoughts on “Finally I’m getting angry

  1. I recognise that! I think it’s easier to be angry with the other person, because you don’t have all the years of emotion and time and so on invested in them. It might be scapegoating, but sometimes just being angry – because it is deserved – helps, and is a pleasant (hmm!) change from the unhappiness.

    Good luck! x

  2. It sounds like she does deserve your anger, but he does as well. it was not her that cheated on you. yes, she was a homewrecking slutbunny, but you can’t let him off Scot free either. And to comment on one of your other posts, you can’t blame yourself, there were two people in your marriage, he’s obviously not without fault. I am so sorry to hear your story. it’s tragic really. It will take some time, allow yourself to deal with the emotions that will come along and don’t let anyone tell you that you should be over it by now. And when you’re ready, go and find yourself a ‘boytoy’! Or at least maybe a new hair style or a pedicure. Something that is just for you.

    • Thank you for your kind comments. I am doing the nurturing bit. Eating is still an issue but I have learnt to graze rather than cook meals which I usually bin!

      I will get there – in my own time- I am determined!!!

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