I need to remind myself….

I need to remind myself:

  1. Not to keep using the post title “sleep – how I wish”   as it’s becoming repetitive.
  2. I am going to have a fun filled future free from fear, frustration and ‘freezing’!!
  3. Alex could have chosen to be part of that but has opted out and it’s his loss.
  4. My dolls house is cuddly and will be warm and I shall feel safe
  5. I am young at heart, funny, cuddly, intelligent and people like me lots and lots
  6. And I must look forward not back.

So Alex has now left.  We had a pleasant evening together.  We drank nearly all of a bottle of wine and  – of course – copious amounts of tea.  The British always drink tea when under stress!!!  Just remember “Notting Hill” !! “Drink Tea”  – we did – cups and cups of it!  I shall be up all night (No change there then!!)

So you can guess how I’m feeling.  It’s not even worth me writing about it. We all know ‘where I am’.  But I am not actually down. Just frustrated (and not in the way you might think) with how this has all ended up………

No I AM NOT  – POSITIVELY NOT GOING THERE!!

Focus Caroline – ON THE FUTURE!  IT’S GOT SO MUCH MORE TO OFFER.

NO PAIN JUST PLEASURE.

I shall go and play with my little green cards some more.  I will get them in order.  I am determined to.  Somehow!!

Alex spotted I had Intelligence at the end  – which is clearly bizarre!!

And just one last thing for this evening:

Some of my ducks may be having trouble riding all the waves  – but at least they are swimming and they are all swimming in the right direction – most of the time!  Well most of them are these days and I can chivvy the odd stray one who turns round and tries to go the wrong way!!

I am not so sure about Alex’s ducks.  From what he said this evening they haven’t all made their minds up and are considering their options!

One thought on “I need to remind myself….

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