Too many memories, too much nostalgia. I sometimes wonder if women rush down memory lane more than men do – or is it just me?
Yesterday started so well. I met up with a friend at Hampton Court for coffee and – if I might say – a stunning cake – and had a lovely chat. Then I pottered round Hampton Court gardens and amazed myself in the maze ( I found the middle and the way out without much trouble!) then returned home!
All still going well I set off on the dreaded exercise on my bike – still good. My ride invariably takes me past the family house, where my Dad lived and Alex and I also owned a share. I am fine with this. No problems at all.
Except yesterday – since the refurbishment of the bit Alex and I owned is now complete – I stopped to have a look round inside!! Now on a scale of 1 – 10 of good ideas where 1 is bad – I scored 0! The builders tactfully kept out of the way. Off I went down memory lane. Thoughts flooded over me like a burst dam!! The flat looks stunning. Truly beautiful. But Oh Dear – not good for my state of mind. Just as well I was on my own! Every room brought back happy memories! Even if some of the rooms now look so different.
Actually one of the reasons I went in is my brother is going to have an ‘open day’ for all the neighbours – which he suggested I could come to!!!! Bless him – he really doesn’t know what he’s saying some of the time – Hello – I am actually one of the owners!!!! And if he had a grain of sense he’d realise (as the builders did) that I probably needed to go round on my own. Without everyone watching my every reaction! All too deeply personal to be doing it in front of an audience.
So I cycled home in a state of misery – considering the ‘Mine’ and basically thoroughly upset!
Maybe I just had to bang the final nail into that particular coffin. I know it did have to be done at some point. It’s just doing it was tough! And I wish I wasn’t so ‘addicted’ to nostalgia!!
So even though I spent the evening doing a few things on the goals list my heart wasn’t really in it. And the feeling hasn’t gone this morning……
Today is Life Coaching