In what feels like my relentless search for answers – you know the answers to – the WHYs? the HOW COMEs? the HOW COULD YOUs? I’ve now come to the conclusion that I will never know and actually do I really need to.
I’d love answers but only if they’re the answers I want to hear! Not the ones I’m more likely to be given!
And actually in this rather fruitless search have I ever asked the right questions.
None of the questions that have assailed my confused brain have been very growth orientated. I never asked – kindly and lovingly – , for example, “What do you want to achieve?”
And – given the fact that the answer to that is, probably, a combination of “Happiness, passion, freedom from feeling as I do now”
Then surely the next response should have been “Wouldn’t it be great and wouldn’t you just love it if you got all those things again with me?”
That would have been a growth orientated conversation!
Sadly not one we ever had. And now I’ve learned (from Stephen’s coaching) that these ideas can be a real possibility, it’s been a tough thing to come to terms with. Tougher than I can describe.
It’s not too late for my brother, H, but in his current state no-one can get close enough to pose those questions and so give him the opportunity to, perhaps, see things in a different way.
I’m sure we all have questions, every day. I now feel the important thing is to know what we want from the answer and then work out what the real question should be!