That’s what it all boils down to in the end isn’t it!
Men and women communicate in different ways. All well and good but what if a man is in turmoil, for whatever reason, how do we wonderful women get are darling men to open up and tell us? That’s what I want to know. How do we help?
Given that the man’s role – so I understand from Stephen (and I agree with him btw) – is to care and protect, I presume they feel they are failing if they hit a stumbling block and so can’t actually talk about it as this makes them feel even more of a failure as it voices their fears and vulnerabilities – which isn’t at all ‘manly’.
So, say, for instance, the man has a problem at work, or loses his job, or fails at an interview…… The list is endless…………..
How do we wonderful women, who are feminine and vulnerable and hanging on to our femininity and have no wish to ‘become manly’, how do we get our men to open up and still make them feel Strong and Manly?
In this minefield of communication we need tools. Not only tools to help us say how we feel when we have problems but tools to help us help our men.
How do we create that safe haven for our men that allows them to say how they feel. Which enables them to communicate their problems without emasculating them?
Because if we know that then we can also create the same ‘safe haven’ for us to communicate back when we have problems.Because our men would recognise this ‘safe place’ and be happy to ‘enter into it’, knowing they were going to be respected and their manliness wouldn’t be in question.
OK they also have to learn about how women communicate but hey I can’t sort everything out here in one post!!
And don’t tell me it’s the man’s job to ‘create the haven’ – I don’t believe it is! Women are better at saying how they feel so – in my view (and I could be wrong) it’s our ‘job’ to create this environment where difficult communication can take place ‘safely’.
If we knew and understood that wouldn’t it be just great.
So all I now need is information………
And some views and ideas!