My wish for 2012

So how far have I got on getting my dream future

If I’m honest I haven’t achieved many of the goals. But as the saying goes (I hope) – I’m on my way.

So this year my wish is for all those who are in the same boat as me – so many of my fellow bloggers  who have been cast adrift against their wishes in a lifeboat they didn’t choose – may you find your goal and a new ‘life purpose’ –  to quote a certain Life Coach (!) –  and to learn how to focus on your futures rather than the past. To re-ignite your passion for living and for life

I wish and hope the pain diminishes for you.  I wish and hope you find the happiness which is yours by right. That the world treats you with love and care over the coming 12 months and that the hurt you’ve been through turns into hope, fun, laughter and joy – oh yes and more FUN!

That the world heals your wounds and the dark clouds which have that annoying habit of appearing just when you thought you’d banished them actually do go for good.

That the surreal feeling of your, and my, situation disappears

I wish you all meet the person of your dreams and find passion in your lives again if that’s what you truly want.

I wish and hope my brother digs deep and realises that he is throwing away so much and that possibly there is a beautiful and passionate future with the woman he married 28 years ago.  That he learns and understands that we all have failings and to admit to them is to be human.  That he discovers a little humility would make him so much more loveable and by letting people in rather than keeping them at arms’ length that the community spirit which surrounds him would respond with such kindness.

To those who are studying I wish you all amazing success and achievement.

To all those bloggers who have inspired me and egged me on as I found my way through the horror to where I am now  I say a big thank you, but especially to:

Counting Ducks,
Back on my Own,
Four is Family,
Poor Cow in France,
Lost in France

I’d like to thank LFBA  and Stephen for their contributions to that epic discussion Why Isn’t today Wednesday which had me mesmerized and from which I learnt so much.

You are all special to me in so many ways even if in most cases I’ve never actually met you.

And finally, of course, my Life Coach Stephen whose comments here have, for me, been so valuable.  Who has coached me into seeing my life differently and who, I might add, I can now totally blame for my overspending with Amazon as I become immersed in a subject which I’m finding fascinating and all consuming!!

And for god’s sake tell me if I become too nerdy and boring about my new direction in life!!!  I may ignore you because this is my blog – but I’d still like to know as the discussions are such fun!!

I wish you all good health and happiness and may 2012 be good to you.

Have fun everyone!!  Focus on the future!  Find some goals, paint your toenails blue and go for it!

Now where are all those men on the dating sites I’m on – come on!!

Getting a bit of Passion

That’s what we all want!  Some of my fellow bloggers already have it – lucky sods!

Some of us are missing out on sex and passion at the moment – which feels a bit frustrating in more ways than I’m prepared to discuss here, so leave to your imagination.

Now I’m not going to rush around and have some ‘adult fun’ just for the sake of it as I think it wouldn’t do my mental state any good at all

But there are other forms of passion!  Clearly I appear to have found a Passion for becoming a Life Coach – either that or I’ve been seduced by the book covers at Amazon!  I say this as 3 ( yes I know THREE!) more books on NLP have just arrived on my doorstep.  Given the speed with which said bookstore is delivering them I think they must be overjoyed with my continued business and are therefore encouraging me to assist their profits!!

So if anyone asks me now did Life Coaching do me any good or would I have got to where I am without it the answer would have to be “I don’t know!”  Yes time heals – it has and continues to do so but I definitely wouldn’t be keeping the world of NLP book sales going so well if I hadn’t chosen to go the route I did!!

Now about that other passion. Perhaps I just need to log on to Ann Summers and solve that one too!  Given the lack of an alternative!!

(given how I’ve ‘tagged’ this post I now expect my site hits to soar and will be disillusioned if they don’t!)




The answer is Carrot cake – so what’s the question!

Apparently, according to today’s spam comment my Posts are not as good as they could be and I should try Carrot Cake Instead!

Well it’s a thought!

I’m not sure how carrot cake will help my writing here.  But who am I to argue!  Clearly spam commenters know best!

Carrots are supposed to help one to ‘see’ so maybe carrot and sugar and all the other scrumptious ingredients that go into the carrot cake I make could be the answer.  I don’t actually have my favourite recipe to hand at the moment as the book is buried deep in one of the boxes I stored a year ago and which are now lurking in the garage across the alleyway from my little cottage.

I know the recipe involves lots of ground almonds and NO CINNAMON (which I’m not overly fond of so just as well).  So am I sufficiently inspired by this request from my spam commenter to go on a hunt for the box which contains the book which contains the recipe – well no if I’m honest!!

Actually I’m horrified by the number of boxes which appeared last week when my belongings returned!  God knows what’s in them all – mostly wrapping paper I imagine.

So the question remains will carrots  improve my writing? Discuss!

Well,  I’ve created a whole post around this spam comment!

A whole mass of drivel and you dear reader have just read it – that’s if you’ve got this far and not had the sense to give up after the first paragraph!

We’re all chums when the Mayor comes

I may have mentioned this before and if I have then sorry!  I can’t be bothered to trawl back through all my posts to find which one it might be in (possibly amongst some comments somewhere!)

Anyway, I am – for reasons that currently escape me – participating in the local production of the pantomime Dick Whittington  this year as part of the chorus.  A pantomime which has scope for plenty of double meanings – well smut really!

So being a stalwart lot we threw ourselves into the line:

We’re all chums when the Mayor comes

until that is I failed to keep a straight face and  got the giggles and it was pointed out to the director of the pantomime that perhaps this was just something she might want to change!

With a flourish she amended it to

We all cheer as dick is here

Which reduced the chorus to hysterics.

So, sadly for the residents of our village we are now singing

We all cheer as the mayor is here.

so no possibility of smut there then!!

I see my role in the chorus as one specifically designed to upstage the main characters and possibly to make them forget their lines!

My role in the harem scene is something I will leave to your imagination.  Suffice it to say I refuse to reveal my midriff – on the grounds that too many pensioners might suffer!

I really must get round to learning the words to all the songs though!!……..

Blog Titles – are they hindering us?

My relentless studying is giving me masses to think about.  How the brain will react to the tiniest, almost insignificant, word.  How we can so easily end up giving ourselves the wrong or right outcome just by changing the words we use.

This is what I mean:

I’ve set myself my goal:  To become a life coach.

I can ask myself two types of question:

1)  How will I feel if I’ve achieved it?
2)  How will I feel when I’ve achieved it?

Two questions so similar – after all there’s only one word which is different.  But that one word change makes a huge difference to how I feel.  Question One leaves me with a feeling of doubt.  A feeling that I’m going to have to struggle to get there and might not make it.  Question Two makes me feel amazing.  A feeling that I’m going to enjoy the ‘journey’ and that when I get there I’m going to feel even more amazing.

So that got me thinking.  How often do we inadvertently give ourselves the wrong message?  Most of the readers I get here have their own blogs.  Many of them are going through challenging times, similar to mine.  Many of us get stuck and find unsticking really difficult.

Small steps forward are definitely the order of the day.  But dear reader without realising it do even our blog titles give us the wrong message.

So my challenge to you all today is: Look at the title of your blog and ask yourself:

“Am I giving myself the best possible chance to ensure I will achieve my ultimate goal? Or without really realising it am I  feeding myself a stuck message?”:

Think about it!  Does your blog title portray a fantastic forward looking goal or does it give……

A backward looking message, a negative message, a lonely message, a poor me message, a lost message, an angry message ………??

My intention when I started my blog was to get out of my hole – my Chilean Mine! To Survive!  And survival to me meant real, amazing happiness.  I’ve found it a million times more difficult than I thought I would!  But my intention was and is to end up happy, which I hope in part is yours too.

So dear reader if you’ve got this far and not gone off in a rage of How dare she suggest such a thing, how about giving this a thought!

And then maybe doing something about it!!!!

Hugs to you all!


Telephone Calls, Turkey and TV

I hope you had a lovely day yesterday, dear reader!  I did.  I had a lie in.  I studied (I think it’s becoming an obsession!)  and then I went to friends for a late lunch, played with their 7 month old granddaughter. The day drifted happily into an afternoon of playing games and watching strange programmes on TV – those ones especially reserved for Christmas day viewing!!

And I didn’t bolt!!

So this year was better than last, which was better than the one before!  Small steps!

A great friend of mine  who became world champion glider pilot many years ago, said the art of winning was not to look back.  Not wishing you’d taken that extra thermal or extra 100 feet or so to gain that little bit more height.  Because as he so succinctly put it:

The situation you’re in is the situation you’re in.

And the only way to keep airborne is to deal with the situation you’re in there and then, and not waste one moment of brain power or energy wishing you’d done something different before.  Use the knowledge you have and the knowledge you’ve just gained as a positive, and with that new found knowledge and your ability,  concentrate on dealing with your NOW, to keep in the air and keep moving forward and this time in the next thermal climb a few more 100 feet  so you can improve your chances of winning.

So dear reader may you pull on the resources and brilliant ability within you to fly your own particular course and win your personal competition.