Early Morning Stroll

For those of you who want to know how last night went – I had a fabulous time with my friends at their Glee’s evening.  We had a brilliant time singing Flanders and Swann songs (see my Music page for some!).  We sang The Seahorse and The Sloth and many others.  Wonderful food and great company!

Their friend was ‘interesting’.  I have to say it’s rare for me to meet someone these days and feel I can see why they are divorced!   Not so in his case!!  I can totally understand why he is on his own!!  Enough said!  (But I proved I had lightening reflexes by catching his wine glass as he knocked it over and righting it before it hardly spilled a drop!!!)

I have just returned from a very early morning walk by the lake, which now has lots of ducklings swimming along behind their mothers.  And we all know how I feel about ducks being in a row!!

The lake is still a very special place for me – but gosh so many memories. And they all flood back like a tidal wave whipped up by the wind.  They come rushing to the shore and envelop my being.  It’s a fight to keep them away.  But it’s a fight I know I have to win.  I have to walk the path and create new memories so I can push the others out.  It’s always harder after I’ve had a particularly splendid evening out as the contrast is greater.

But to do the opposite and not have the fun is to live a mediocre life – and that I categorically do not want to do.

Morning walk. Observations & Random Musings (amended)

Out early on my lakeside walk
In silence. Alone. No need to talk.

Reed bunting flitting by the shore.
(I may be content – but I want more).

Last year’s bulrushes turned to fluff
(Must let go of sadness – I’ve had enough).

Solitary daffodil.  In stark yellow.
Passing dog walkers. Nod-smile, hello.

Ferns burgeoning on the bank
(I should be more grateful. I’ve a lot to thank).

Chiffchaffs returned from their winter home
(I am myself.  Please  not long alone).

Pussy willow, fluffy on the bough.
(I must start living the here and now).

No sign of the blackcaps for me so far.
(Love is loving his inappropriate car)!

Heron stands on guard looking proud
(We’ve lost so much, I cry out loud).

Moorhens hunting for things to eat.
(I’m NOT the failure.  I didn’t cheat).

Nest building of many shapes; designs.
(Lust entwines but love combines).

Courting grebes make a wonderful sight.
(No sex – again  – for me last night).

Protective swan gives a warning hiss.
(It’s that abandonment in passion that I so miss).

Sand Martins fly and swoop to feed.
(Maybe a vibrator’s what I need!)

Waterfowl – each nest-building slave
(Talking, sharing is what I crave).

The cacophony of bird song – what a din
(True happiness comes from within)

Geese take off into a sunlit sky
(Ground level’s not enough – I need to fly!)

So as I walk the mile on mile
I hope this post has made you smile!

And if it did please tick the like box – and also feel free to comment!

Places I can’t go

I need to overcome this.

I can’t go to Africa (which is a very large place not to go!  And one which – on a day-to-day basis – I am unlikely to need  to worry about!).  That’s because Alex and I spent so many holidays there.

And now I find I can’t go to my favourite lake – which is only just down the road.  As it’s where Alex and I have met so often over the last 22 months to talk and try and work through the issues we have.  And where I walked and walked on so many early weekend mornings – on my own  – where I just let the tears run and where I found such peace and tranquility.  But I realise now also  where I look  back and I can’t do that.  Not anymore.

I am in looking forward mode now!

It is a bit restricting though.  As I’ve been asked to stay in South Africa by friends – who I have had to turn down.  And I do like the lake!