Passion doesn’t have to die

At least that’s what I believe. And I believe it totally.  In fact I believe it with a passion!

In the past 48hours 4 women have told me that after several years of marriage “You can’t expect the passion to remain”.  Why not?  That’s what I want to know.  Are they all giving up on keeping passion alive? And if so why?

Has ‘society’ instilled in us some low expectation of what a life-long partnership should be about? Do we have such low expectations of our relationships?  Or do we get too busy and miss paying attention to the most important part of life – our relationship with the person closest to us?

Is that why so many marriages fail these days?

And those that stay together, so many seem to be plodding through their emotional lives in a sort of fatalistic view that there isn’t any other option.  And no I don’t advocate throwing it all away and starting afresh.  I advocate finding out what each other’s needs really are, then adding a bit of fun at ‘working’ at the passion!

Why my early morning visit to the bluebell wood got me thinking about this I have no idea!!


We should never have upgraded the software……..

FROM: Distressed
TO: Technical  Support Department

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slowdown in overall system performance.  The new program began making unexpected changes to the accounting software; severely limiting access to wardrobe, flower and jewelry applications that operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. No mention of this phenomenon was included in the product brochure. In addition, Husband 1.0 un-installed many other valuable programs such as Romance and Personal Attention. It also installed new, undesirable programs such as Rugby, Football, Sailing and Continuous TV.  Conversation 3.6 no longer runs and House Cleaning 4.00 simply crashes the system,  I’ve tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix Husband 1.0, but this all purpose utility is of limited effectiveness. Can you help, please!!!!

FROM: Technical  Support
TO: Distressed

Yours is a common problem women complain about and is mostly due to a misconception. Many people upgrade from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 with no idea that Boyfriend 5.0 is merely an ENTERTAINMENT package. However, Husband 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and was designed by its creator to run as few applications as possible. Further, you cannot purge Husband 1.0 and return to Boyfriend 5.0, because Husband 1.0 is not designed to do this. Hidden operating files within your system would cause Boyfriend 5.0 to emulate Husband 1.0, so nothing is gained. It is impossible to uninstall, delete, or purge the program files from the system, once installed. Any new program files can only be installed once per year, as Husband 1.0 has severely limited memory. Error messages are common, and a normal part of Husband 1.0.

In desperation to play some of their “old time” favorite applications, or to get new applications to work, some women have tried to install Boyfriend 6.0, or Husband 2.0. However, these women end up with more problems than encountered with Husband 1.0. Look in your manual under “Warnings: Divorce”. You will notice that this program runs very poorly, and comes bundled with HeartBreak 1.3. I recommend you keep Husband 1.0, and just learn the quirks of this strange and illogical system. Having Husband 1.0 installed myself, I might also suggest you read the entire section regarding General Partnership Faults [GPFs]. This is a wonderful feature of Husband 1.0, secretly installed by the parent company as an integral part of the operating system. Husband 1.0 must assume ALL responsibility for ALL faults and problems, regardless of root cause. To activate this great feature enter the command “C:\ I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME”. Sometimes Tears 6.2 must be run simultaneously while entering the command. Husband 1.0 should then run the applications Apologize 12.3 and Flowers/Chocolates 7.8.

TECH TIP! Avoid excessive use of this feature. Overuse can create additional and more serious GPFs, and ultimately YOU may have to give a C:\ I APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal operations. Overuse can also cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, or worse yet, to Beer 6.0. Beer 6.0 is a very bad program that causes Husband 1.0 to create Fat Belly files and Snoring Loudly wave files that are very hard to delete. Save yourself some trouble by following this tech tip! Just remember! The system will run smoothly, and take the blame for all GPFs, but because of this fine feature it can only intermittently run all the applications Boyfriend 5.0 ran.

Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. Consider buying additional software to improve performance. I personally recommend Hot Food 3.0, Sexy Lingerie 5.3 and Patience 10.1. Used in conjunction, these utilities can really help keep Husband 1.0 running smoothly. After several years of use, Husband 1.0 will become familiar and you will find many valuable embedded features such as Fix Broken Things 2.1, Snuggling 4.2 and Best Friend7.6.

A final word of caution! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Motherin Law 1.0.  It runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of your entire system resources.  causing selective shutdown of the operating system and crashing Husband 1.0

Best wishes

I take no credit for the above – I found it on the internet!!

Seeing it in Print

Why is it that I can be doing quite well.  Well I think I have been!  And soldier on without too many issues and then when a large white envelope arrives in my post box full of documents from my solicitor I plummet like a stone yet again.

And plummet I did.  Was it seeing the part that said Alex intends to cohabit that hit hardest? (And I’ve known that’s what he is or intends doing all along so that’s not exactly new information). Or just the fact that my marriage has now been reduced to a lengthy legal document full of words like “Applicant” and “Respondent”.  It’s all so cold.   There is no affection in the legal process of divorce.  Just one’s own personal memories of love, affection and happiness.  I know that’s how it has to be, that it can’t be anything else.  But yesterday it hurt and I wept buckets.

It’s not over yet either.  Still the papers will be bounced, once again, between my solicitor and his, as yet again words need to be changed and paragraphs clarified.  More cost!

So for me the Longest Day was incredibly long. And so, so sad.

What a day!!

Beautiful bride!  Stunning dress.  The small bridesmaids were just scrumptious and her sister just looked amazing –  I reckon she couldn’t have been wearing much underneath that figure-hugging dress!!

I thought the address by the Bishop of London was not only very personal for them it was incredibly ‘on message’ for everyone.

But it makes one think of one’s own wedding though doesn’t it!  Which could be classed as a bit of a bu**er.  But that’s the way the cookie crumbles.

I’ve been out to a couple of street parties this afternoon, which have been fun and I’m now having a peaceful evening in.  Watching all the highlights of everything I watched this morning!

I’m a romantic at heart!!

To those getting married today

I wish one particular and very special couple getting married today all the happiness in the world.

May they nurture and care for each other through all life’s ups and downs.

May they remember to communicate when the going gets tough – which it will at times.

May they remember to meet each other’s needs every day.

May they laugh and love and be happy at working at their marriage.

And above all may they continue to be themselves and grow through the wonderful life they have ahead of them.