I visualise time.
I see the early 20th century as a place far behind me, slightly to the right and way below where I am now. The century travels upwards along a path. Sometimes there are stairs; sometimes just a path. Events happen to the left, right and along the path.
I visualise the time before I was born as way below me. A place my parents had to climb up from to reach the day when I arrived.
The path isn’t straight. It meanders over to the left and back to the right. But always behind.
My childhood is captured in my mind’s eye by a myriad of images; some still; some moving. My parents, my brothers, my friends, my schools, college, my first job and so on. On upwards goes the path. I can turn and look back and see it there behind and below me. I can hear my parents’ voices; my school song. Fleeting clips which are all part of me. I can hear my father playing the piano.
I can smell my mother’s perfume. I can smell the smell of the burned out wreck of our house the day after it was consumed by fire in 1982.
I can feel various moments which were special. The thrill of going solo in a glider. Moments of giggles with some member of the family……. Lots
The change of the century triggered a flat piece of road. How interesting! But the road ceases to climb very steeply. More of a shallow incline, if at all. It runs through various landscapes. Mostly captured through the amazing holidays Alex and I had. But it definitely doesn’t climb!. It is however, filled with lots of sunshine. And a feeling of incredible peace but also occasional insecurity.
Then came the crash and I was pitchforked into my Chilean Mine. And yes my time path does take a run downhill. Into the dark. I can actually see me in the dark. Lost. My journey out is diaried here in great detail! All I know is that how I see it now is me moving through many dark passageways but always being led by someone in front with a candle or torch lighting the way and guiding me away from the dead-ends towards the exit – and always climbing. Always encouraging me to climb, almost forcing me on. Out into a certain amount of light and then a big climb to where I am now. My past catching at my heels.
I’ve no idea what triggered this post today. Something did!